Sexuality

Anand, Margo. The Art of Sexual Ecstacy: The Path of Sacred Sexuality for Western Lovers. Jeremy P. Tacher, Inc. 1989. Looking at enhancing your sexual relationship from the perspective of Eastern sexual philosophy.

Barbach, Lonnie. The Pause: Positive Approaches to Perimenopause and Menopause. Plume Books, 2000. A helpful guide for women in midlife.

Davis, Michelle Weiner. The Sex-Starved Marriage: A Couple's Guide to Boosting Their Marriage Libido. Simon & Schuster, 2003. Very practical ideas for both the high libido and low libido partners, from a non-blaming perspective.

Dodson, Betty. Sex for One. Crown Publishers, 1996. A lively book about masturbation.

Ellison, Carol. Women's Sexualities. New Harbinger Publications, 2000. Information and analysis, based on in-depth interviews with women, ages 23 to 90, about the challenges of sexual development.

George, Stephen C. and K. Winston Caine. A Lifetime of Sex: The Ultimate Manual on Sex, Women, and Relationships for Every Stage of a Man's Life. Rodale Press, Inc., 1998. A developmental perspective on male sexuality.

Heiman, Julie & Joseph LoPiccolo. Becoming Orgasmic: A Sexual and Personal Growth Program for Women. Prentice Hall Press, 1988. A comprehensive, informative and practical resource for women and their partners.

Holstein, Lana L. How to Have Magnificent Sex: The Seven Dimensions of a Vital Sexual Connection. Harmony Books, 2001. Ideas for enhancing comfort and satisfaction with sex.

Love, Patricia. Hot Monogamy: Essential Steps to More Passionate, Intimate Lovemaking. Plume Books, 1994 . A non-blaming approach to dealing with differences in libido, and a guide for couples to learn more about each partner's sexual style.

Love, Patricia. The Truth About Love: The Highs, the Lows, and How You Can Make it Last Forever. Plume Books, 2001. An informative look at the various stages of romantic relationships and practical ideas for deepening intimate connection.

Maltz, Wendy. The Sexual Healing Journey. Harper Collins, 1991. A guide for men and women who have experienced sexual abuse, with practical exercises for enhancing comfort with touch.

Maltz, Wendy & Suzie Boss. In the Garden of Desire: The Intimate World of Women's Sexual Fantasies. Broadway Books, 1997. An unique and informative look at the nature of women's sexual fantasies.

Maltz, Wendy. Intimate Kisses: The Poetry of Sexual Pleasure. New World Library, 2001. A unique collection of poems that celebrate loving sexual intimacy.

Newman, Felice. The Whole Lesbian Sex Book: A Passionate Guide for All of Us. Cleis Press, 1999. A comprehensive sex manual designed for lesbians and also suitable for heterosexual women who want to enhance their sexuality.

Penner, Clifford & Joyce Penner. The Gift of Sex: A Guide to Sexual Fulfillment. Word, Inc., 1981. Written from a Christian perspective, including quotes from scripture, this guide normalizes and gives permission for masturbation and any consensual sexual activity between heterosexual married partners.

Reichman, Judith. I'm Not in the Mood: What Every Woman Should Know About Improving Her Libido. Quill William Morrow, 1998. Specific information for women dealing with low sex drive.

Schnarch, David. Passionate Marriage: Keeping Love and Intimacy Alive in Committed Relationships. W.W.Norton & Co., 1997. A provocative approach to overcoming sexual problems and enhancing sexual satisfaction, with many examples from Dr. Schnarch's clinical practice.

Silverstein, Charles and Felice Picano. The New Joy of Gay Sex. Perennial, 1993. A sex manual including safer-sex practices.

Stewart, Elizabeth and Paula Spencer. The V Book: A Doctor's Guide to Complete Vulvovaginal Health. Bantam, 2002. A comprehensive guide from the latest clinical research about vulvovaginal health and sexual pain disorders.

Zilbergeld, Bernie. The New Male Sexuality: The Truth about Men, Sex and Pleasure. Bantam Books, 1992. An excellent and comprehensive guide to all aspects of male sexuality, from looking at one's sexual self-image to dealing with specific sexual problems.

Depression / Anxiety

Bourne, Edmund J. The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook. NewHarbinger Publications, 1990. Clear, step-by-step directions for mastery of panic attacks, negative self-talk, and irrational beliefs. Tips for building assertiveness, self-esteem, and relaxation skills.

Burns, David. Feeling Good: the New Mood Therapy. Wm. Morrow & Co., 1980. Avon Books, New & Revised Edition, 1999. A psychiatrist presents techniques for developing a positive outlook on life. Revised edition adds a consumer's guide to anti-depressant medications.

Copeland, Mary Ellen. The Depression Workbook: A Guide for Living with Depression and Manic Depression. NewHarbinger Publications, 1992. Clear, practical exercises for dealing with depression and manic episodes.

Kasl, Chalotte. If the Buddha Dated, A Handbook for Finding Love on a Spiritual Path. Penguin Books, 1999.

Kasl, Charlotte. If the Buddah Married, Creating Enduring Relationships on a Spiritual Path. Penguin Books, 2001.

Lerner, Harriet. Fear and Other Uninvited Guests: Tackling the Anxiety, Fear and Shame That Keep us from Optimal Living and Loving. HarperCollins, 2004. A warm, witty invitation to looking at our anxieties in some new lights.

Real, Terrence. I Don't Want to Talk About It: Overcoming the Secret Legacy of Male Depression. Fireside, 1997. A view of depression as a silent epidemic in men, one that is hidden to avoid the stigma of depression's "unmanliness."

Wilson, H. Reid. Don't Panic: Taking Control of Anxiety Attacks. HarperPerennial, 1996. Effective advice and self-help skills for those dealing with panic attacks.

Relationships / Intimacy

Gottman, John. Why Marriages Succeed or Fail, and How you can make yours last. Simon & Schuster, 1994. Based on years of research with couples - how to assess and correct pitfalls in your relationship.

Gottman, John. The Seven Principles For Making Marriage Work. Henry Holt & Co., 1999. Practical questionnaires and exercises for resolving marriage conflicts and building connection.

Gross, Zenith. Seasons of the Heart: Men and Women Talk About Love, Sex and Romance After 60. New World Library, 2000.

Hendrix, Harville. Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples. Henry Holt & Co., 1988. A practical guide for building empathy and communication between partners.

Hendrix, Harville. Keeping the Love You Find: A Personal Guide. Pocket Books, 1992. A practical guide for singles to find and sustain a healthy relationship.

Isensee, Rik. Love Between Men: Enhancing Intimacy and Keeping Your Relationship Alive. Alyson Publications, 1996. Approaches to improve communication, resolve everyday conflicts, and satisfy a partner's emotional and sexual needs.

Lerner, Harriet. The Dance of Anger, A Woman's Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships. Harper & Row, 1989. A classic and extremely useful approach to clarifying one's position in all sorts of close relationships, and to avoiding endless arguments.

Lerner, Harriet. The Dance of Intimacy, A Woman's Guide to Courageous Acts of Change in Key Relationships. Harper & Row, 1989. A guide to looking at current relationship conflicts through the lens of our families of origin.

Love, Patricia, The Truth About Love: The Highs, the Lows, and How You Can Make it Last Forever. Plume Books, 2001. An informative look at the various stages of romantic relationships and practical ideas for deepening intimate connection.

May, Alice. Surviving Betrayal: Hope and Help for Women Whose Partners Have Been Unfaithful. HarperCollins, 1999. 365 daily meditations, offering wisdom and guidance for coping with the pain of betrayal.

Pittman, Frank. Private Lies: Infidelity and the Betrayal of Intimacy. W.W.Norton, 1989. Identifies four basic patterns of infidelity, discusses how to limit the damage from affairs, and offers suggestions on how to make a marriage work.

Spring, Janis Abrahms. After the Affair, Healing the Pain and Rebuilding Trust When a Partner Has Been Unfaithful. Harper/Perennial, 1997.

Tannen, Deborah. You Just Don't Understand: Women and Men in Conversation. Ballantine, 1991. A best-selling book that discusses inherent differences in the communication styles of men and women.

Weiner-Davis, Michele. Divorce Busting: A Step-by-Step Approach to Making Your Marriage Loving Again. Fireside, 1992. Helpful to one partner or both, a positive approach to solving marital stalemates.

Wisdon, Susan & Jennifer Green. StepCoupling: Creating and Sustaining a Strong Marriage in Today's Blended Family. Three Rivers Press, 2002. Tips and strategies for coping with the realities of step-parenting and blended families.

Mindfulness / Focusing

Brach, Tara. Radical Acceptance: Embracing Your Life with the Heart of a Buddha. Bantam Books, 2003. A gentle, compassionate guide for moving from shame and unworthiness to acceptance of who we are.

Kabat-Zinn, Jon. Full Catastrophe Living: Using the Wisdom of Your Body and Mind to Face Stress, Pain, and Illness. Dell Publishing, 1990. A practical guide to mindfulness, meditation and healing.

Harp, David with Feldman, Nina, Ph.D. The Three Minute Meditator: 30 Simple Ways to Unwind Your Mind While Enhancing your Emotional Intelligence. NewHarbinger Publications, 1996. Some doable pathways to meditation, written clearly and with humor.

NOTE: The following books are two of the clearest writings on learning to accept and embrace ourselves as we are and on how to be present in each and every moment of our lives: In other words, how to live our lives to the fullest. They are written from the Buddhist perspective. Buddhists have been practicing mindfulness and focusing for a very long time. These particular volumes are written by western women who came to Buddhism towards midlife and appear to have very good insight into the problems we face in this culture.

These books are gems. You need not have an interest in Buddhism to find them valuable.

Chodron, Pema. When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times. Shambhala Publications, 1997.

Khema, Ayya. Being Nobody, Going Nowhere: Meditations on the Buddhist Path. Wisdom Publications, 1987.

Parenting

Coon, Cheryl. Books to Grow With: A Guide to Using the Best Children's Fiction for Everyday Issues and Tough Challenges. Lutra Press, 2004. More than 500 thoroughly researched and carefully recommended books on over 100 topics of concern to children and their parents.

Gottman, John. Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child: The Heart of Parenting. Fireside, 1997. A guide to helping children understand and regulate their emotional worlds.

Lerner, Harriet. The Mother Dance: How Children Change Your Life. HarperCollins, 1998. A gentle challenge to the myth of the perfect, anxiety-free mom who can control her children's destinies.

Martin, April. The Lesbian and Gay Parenting Handbook. HarperCollins, 1993. Interviews with families and discussions with experts on issues related to gay family life.

Schwartz, Pepper. Ten Talks Parents Must Have with Their Children About Sex and Character. Time Warner Trade Publishing, 2000.A resource for parents of children from 4 through 12 about how to initiate conversations about sexuality and other important topics.

Sex Addiction / Compulsion

Carnes, Patrick J. Don't Call it Love: Recovery from Sexual Addiction. Bantam, 1992. A guide to dealing with compulsive sexual behavior.

Carnes, Patrick J. Out of the Shadows, Understanding Sexual Addiction. Hazelden Publishing, 2001. A clear explanation of the patterns of sexual addiction, and a guide to identifying addictive behaviors.

Carnes, Patrick J. (Editor) In the Shadows of the Net: Breaking Free of Compulsive Online Sexual Behavior. Hazelden Information Education, 2004. Carnes applies his ideas about sexual compulsion to internet sex.

Earle, Ralph and Gregory Crow. Lonely All the Time: Recognizing, Understanding and Overcoming Sex Addiction for Addicts and Co-Dependents. Bradt Publications , 1998

Miscellaneous

Goleman, Daniel. Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More than IQ. Bantam Books, 1995. A provocative look at how empathy, self-awareness, and self-discipline are as important to success as our traditional view of intelligence.

Shapiro, Francine and Margot Silk Forrest. EMDR, The Breakthrough Therapy: For Overcoming Anxiety, Stress and Trauma. Basic Books, 1997. A clear explanation of how EMDR is being used in psychotherapy to effectively deal with trauma.

 

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